Top Beauty Products: By someone who DEFINITELY is not a beauty influencer

There are people who don’t wear make up and don’t know the first thing about it. There are people who wear a minimum amount of makeup. There are people who love makeup think its pretty but are not an artistic with it. Finally,  there are these goddesses who know how to transform themselves. I am in the loving makeup but not an artist category. However, I do like to wear makeup when I go out and am able to do some do some basic looks. Also with working in an office I do put some makeup on at least five times a week.

That being said if you are just looking for practical, yet quality makeup, that can double up for going to work or going to the club then read on. I want to give you the TOP beauty products that I use for my everyday look.

NYX Angel Veil Primer

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At $16.00 this primer is in the medium price range. I use this daily for work and not only does it keep my foundation on, but when mixed with the Morphe setting spray, I don’t have to ever reapply my highlighter and blush throughout the day. However, I wouldn’t say its a great 24 hour primer. I have used it for long nights maybe 8 hours at the most and while my makeup stayed on it isn’t as good compared to higher end primers. NYX is an AMAZING line for quality makeup at a lower price.

Revelon Full Cover Foundation

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This is by far one of my favorite foundations that I have used. It has a nice matte finish and when you get the right color for your skin it looks insanely natural. I know its cliche to say that it really provides full coverage of the skin but it does exactly that, provides full coverage. A lot of foundations claim to be full coverage but this is the best one that I have found. I got this at a Jewel-Osco for 13.00 but it varies from store to store.

Rimmel Stay Matte

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Here is where my total inexperience comes in. I like putting on this pressed powder after my concealer for a more blended look. I am 50 percent it might be setting powder supposed to be used for the last step in the application process but I put it on after my foundation! It’s essentially a sheer powder so you don’t have to worry about adding a whole different color on top of your makeup.

Anastasia Beverly Hills Highlighter Palette

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This product is definitely one of the more expensive products at $40.00. However, she has a mixture of palettes with great colors that are great stand alone or can be mixed together. It last for a long time especially when you use primer and setting spray. The colors are deep and I like how it creates a consistent glow/sparkle. I know a lot of high lighters are kind of patchy and have glitter scattered all over versus a solid condensed glow (if that makes any sense as my complete lack of knowledge shows). It’s by far one of my favorite products it lasts a long time and is worth the money.

OR

Oasis & Paradise Highlight Palette

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I found an app called Hush, which gives you cheap makeup options that you may not find normally. It is here where I found this Oasis & Paradise Highlighter palette by Bad Habit for only $12.00. It lasts for an amazingly long time, especially for the price. I would say its comparable to the Anastasia Beverly Hills palate. I prefer to use this one for every day use since it is cheaper, lasts for a longer time, and it helps me to preserve my Anastasia Beverly Hills palette. Normally, I will just use a splash of any deep pink blush  right under my highlighter unless I am using a deep gold color or a pink color. Then the highlighter can stand on its own.

Morphe Eyeshadow Primer

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Eye-shadow primer is super important for when you want your shadpw to last through the night. Like any other Morphe products not only is this super affordable but its great in quality as well. It sells for about $10.00.I haven’t tested out for periods longer than 8 hours but I will say that it has lasted well in that time span. I also will add there’s been 2-3 times where I fell asleep with my makeup on and the eyeshadow WAS NOT still on when I woke up.

Morphe Eyeshadow Palette

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I LOVE Morphe Eyeshadow Palettes they are only 23 dollars and come with 35 colors in them. Like the Beverly Hills Palettes they are super rich, consistent, and deep in color. You can mix and match colors or you can use just a single color. Morphe has a ton of different palettes for different colors but this is one of my favorites. Their eyeshadow is as good, if not better, than eyeshadow palettes you bay upwards of 40 dollars for.

Real Technique Brushes

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Real technique brushes are AMAZING. They aren’t the cheapest but the best part of these is they can almost ALWAYS be found for a good price at Tj Maxx or Marshalls. The brushes are super soft and they do a fantastic job of applying makeup. Seriously if you are looking for some less expensive but HIGH quality makeup brushes then real techniques is going to be what you want to use. Price varies depending on the brush and where you get it.

Nyx Epic Ink Liner

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I am not talented when it comes to putting eyeliner on in different ways. I like a thin line on the eyelid with a bit of a wing. I can’t make dramatic wings and my biggest thing when putting on eyeliner is not making the line too thick. I love their eyeliners, especially NYX Epic Ink, because they have a super thin tip. This makes it easy to make smaller lines and wings for those who aren’t artistic when it comes to applying eyeliner. This usually runs for about $9.00.

Better Than Sex Mascara by Too Faced

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This mascara is not cheap, a tube of it is about $24.00 but it lasts for about 2-3 months. However, if you are craving INTENSE volume AND length then this is the mascara for you. It is absolutely amazing I get questioned daily about whether or not my eyelashes are fake because this product seriously enhances your eyelashes so much. It also stays on all day so you don’t have to worry about reapplying all the time.

Tarte Lip Paint

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I have searched long and hard for a long lasting lipstick. There is nothing I hate more than having to reapply lipstick frequently. I was so happy when I can across Tarte Lip Paint because they have absolutely gorgeous colors. Not only do these lip paitnts come in a variety of colors but they last a very long time and create a gorgeous matte look. If you want a long lasting Matte look then this is the lipstick you want. One container is about $20.00 dollars and it lasts for months.

Morphe Continous Setting Mist

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I have experimented so much with setting sprays because I cry everytime I have to pay $30.00 for Urban Decay setting spray that only lasts for a little over a month. Yeah, its a good product but I just don’t like it enough to spend that much on that, that frequently. When looking for a new setting spray at Ulta the lady recommended this to me and I have not gone back. This isn’t a spray its a mist. The mist ensures that it gets over your entire face and not just the section that you are spraying. It keeps your makeup PERFECT all day. It is better and beyond Urban Decay setting spray and it is only 16.00 at Ulta.

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT

I won’t even pretend to be talented or know the first thing about makeup but I do like to get dolled up and feel good about myself. These are the products I use to do anything from a simple natural look to a night out on the town look. I tend to buy products that aren’t insanley expensive and last longer. So if you are a little lost like me than I highly recommend the products I have suggested.

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15 Alternative NYE Ideas that aren’t clubbing

If you are a 20 plus something like me then chances are you are getting sick of New Years. The typical over crowded bars, being up charged for drinks, paying extra for food, etc. New Years Eve has become so over hyped that I truly can say I am over doing anything HUGE for it. That is why I am presenting you with 15 different NYE Options other than the typical “clubbing”.

Do a NYE Dinner:

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LOTS of places do a dinner special on New Years and a little party, however if you don’t want to pay an insane amount for dinner and drinks that would normally be a fraction of the price try looking at restaurants that DON’T do a New Years Eve event. It could be a great group event or a romantic date night. Before the ball drops you can do a nice dinner. You still get to get dressed up and have some cocktails but you can leave before the place gets crowded. When you are done with dinner you can continue with some crafty cocktails back at home and watch the New Years, whatever drop. This saves you the money of buying drinks all night and the pain of being out in public on New Years.

Check hotel sites and get a hotel room near by for cheap: 

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My top favorite hotel booking site is www.booking.com but a quick google search can yield you a few great websites for booking a hotel room at a fraction of the cost. However, if you are willing to risk it for the cheapest rates check out Hotel Tonight . This app puts up hotels that are looking to fill up the last of their rooms and usually is the cheapest the night of the booking, Most popular hotels have SOMETHING going on in some part of their hotel for a portion of the night. However, personally I much prefer (and have done with my boyfriend) just getting a hotel room and having an intimate night together. You can also have some friends in the hotel room, which makes it cheaper, but be aware of throwing huge parties especially on New Years as hotels look out for that.

Go on a trip/cruise: 

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Going  into 2013 I spent NYE on a cruise and it was one of the MOST FUN vacations of my life! I know that taking a trip or a cruise is a bit of a more pricey option but if you have the money saved up for a trip around the holidays I highly suggest one of these two options. Sure you may be surrounded by people (or stuck with them if you are on a boat) but you will be somewhere new and not just a normal club that you can go to on any day of the year. This surpasses the normal New Year experience and gives you a chance to travel and see places you have never seen before, which if you ask me is an AMAZING way to go into the New Year.

Check Groupon for alternative NYE events:

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Groupon is great for seeing what events are going on for New Years and its also good if you are trying to get a discount on certain events. Eventbrite is another option but does not offer discounts usually. Going on Groupon means you can find a fun New Years event that can be different and cheap! Just by typing in New Years Chicago I get many results of bar events, hotel parties, light shows, concerts, etc. If you are unsure what to do for New Years or looking for some cheap options see what is going on with Groupon.

Host a NYE Party at your own place:

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This is by far the most simple alternative. If you want to save money and only be around the people you care about then this is the answer! Buy some alcohol order some food and be among good company. Do I really need to explain any more?

NYE Concert:

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A fun way to spend NYE would be listening to an awesome band, artist, cover-band, etc. Concerts are always a great time and ringing in the New Year while listening to music you enjoy and having a few drinks is a totally fun idea. Sure you probably will have to deal with crowds of people like you would at a bar but again this is a unique alternative.

Check out a hole in the wall bar:

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In my opinion hole in the wall spots usually turn out to be the best spots. Do a quick google search of unique and less known places near you. Maybe they will be hosting a New Years event but if they fly pretty under the radar chances are its low-key. This could be perfect for someone who wants to go out on New Years but doesn’t want to do the fancy, clubbing, and typical NYE party.

Throw your own fancy party: 

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I know this is close to holding your own NYE party but this idea is a LITTLE different. If you want to act high-class but on a budget then this is the PERFECT way to do so. In place of a casual NYE party  you can throw your own fancy dinner/cocktail party. Let your guests know that is a black tie event and to dress up! Then google or pinterest  fancy cocktails and horderves and boom you’re in business.

Search alternative community events near you:

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If you are looking for something family-oriented, free or cheap, etc then google the town and park district calendars for your town and towns near you. You can also just do a broad search of “Community New Years Events”. A lot of places like churches, rec centers, etc throw something a little earlier in the day for New Years. Again, if you cannot find anything in your town make sure you check towns near you!

Romantic night in with your loved one:

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Now that I am 24 (25 in 2019) this by far sounds like the best option. Spending a night in drinking champagne and cocktails with Elliot while its just me and him sounds perfect. Now that I’ve talked about my boyfriend I will present this option. If you are in a relationship then spend New Years with that person that you love and stop worrying about making some big elaborate plans. You two are starting another year together as a couple and you can use the time to celebrate your relationship over the previous year and the new beginnings to come in the coming years.  I know this sounds sappy but its just an option!

Potluck:

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A great idea if you don’t want to foot the whole bill of feeding an entire party is having a potluck. Have each of your friend bring a dish and then host a giant feast for all to enjoy. This way you don’t have to do a ton of cooking, foot the bill on catering, and you get to be just with the people you care about.

Spa night:

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This is kind of an extension of the romantic night but it can also be between friends if thats what you wish. Have a night in to pamper yourself. Whatever you can get to have a make-shift at home spa day do it! Go into the new year pampering yourself to the point where you are relaxed and ready to take on the world.

Make creative cocktails:

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I have mentioned this a few times now because well I love the idea of it. I think looking at ways to create a fun cocktail is awesome and there is no better time to try it out then New Years! Pinterest and google searches are probably the easiest and greatest way to find ideas. You can make champagne mixtures, martinis, sangria, fun shots etc there is literally no limit to what you can do. You can have a competition with your friends or you can do this with a small group or yourself (either way prepare for the hangover). If you are looking to be drinking this New Years but not going out this would be one of my suggestions mixed in with throwing your own party.

Find a local bar and event place (Gameworks,, TopGolf, Bowling, etc):

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I think adult arcades, top golf, and all that fun stuff is totally a cool idea on any day of the year. However, I do think that this is also a great alternative to going “out out” for NYE. Usually places like this have NYE packages and again you can check places like Groupon to see if there are any discounts. The more you get in a group usually the cheaper it gets. So if you and your friends are trying to avoid the clubs/bars this new years and just casually grab some drinks and have some fun check this option out!

Celebrate the next day:

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The final option is to not celebrate on New Years at all. Celebrate the first day of 2019! You can do it however you like, whether it be a fun brunch or even a party! Either way you can avoid the New Years crowd all together by just not celebrating on the actual day. If you think about it its really not that big of a deal and kind of a fun idea!

There you have it. My 15 alternative ways to celebrate New Years that aren’t clubbing. I hope you all have enjoyed 2018 and go into 2019 with an amazing start. If you choose to do any of these activities please let me know or you can tag me in them on Instagram at alisonschulthesz

HAPPY HOLIDAYS ALL

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Photo by Craig Adderley on Pexels.com

Women in 2018 : Are our quality of lives declining?

Alright, its been a little since I blogged and that is from lack of planning content because I am in the middle of a MOVE but what better way to jump back into blogging than to attack a super controversial yet important topic.

For the intro of this blog post I am just going to STRONGLY encourage you to read this Instagram post.

Okay, now that you’ve read that (right?) lets clarify a few things before I go off on this topic.

  • I hate talking politics I have avoided it for 24 years but I am SCARED and PISSED
  • I believe in equality of rights between sexes. Plain and simple so if you think men are superior you can get off this page and if you think women are superior you can get off this page. Lets work together.
  • This is a opinionated post I am posting WHAT I THINK. I am not telling YOU HOW TO THINK and I am not MAKING THINGS UP AND PRESENTING THEM AS FACTS (**cough cough** unlike most media sites **cough cough**)
  • I refuse to have a political debate. So if you trying to correct, come at me, etc don’t even try.
  • I believe in due process but I am not ignorant to the fact that a lot of cases don’t have evidence.

Now lets go. HOLY HELL, did I step back into the 1950’s? Men are being appointed (and sadly confirmed) for Supreme court who have a pure hatred for woman, the president is mocking potential rape victims, and men are trying to tell us what to do with OUR bodies. I have two words to describe this all. Absolutely terrifying.

This is not JUST about if he did it or not:

At the end of the day while I do believe the women that came forward, I also believe it is way beyond that. We can put all that aside and talk about one thing. THE WAY THAT HE ACTED WHILE HE WAS “ON TRIAL”. If you missed it let me recap

  • Brett Kavanaugh responded to questions he was asked by saying “I don’t know, have you”. I nannied in college and the kids I nannied said this.
  • Brett Kavanuagh, a man who is up to be a non-partisan member of the supreme court, blamed this whole thing on the democrats.
  • He showed a pure misogynistic attitude.
  • He cried.

I am sorry, this is not how someone we want determining court decisions that effect all of America acting. Often time judges in the supreme court are faced with extreme amounts of pressure when determining the fate of life-changing cases. The fact that Kavanaugh couldn’t conduct himself appropriately under pressure its a HUGE red flag. The fact that he was antagonizing women who were asking questions shows that he has a clear hatred for women. If you just look at him its almost like he can’t even believe a woman would speak to him that way. The fact that he was BLAMING the democrats shows he not capable of making non-partisan decisions on the behalf of America.

It is scary that someone who has clearly shown the opposite of all the “standards” to be a supreme court judge has been confirmed. If we don’t have our standards for this then what do we have? Not to mention after that “performance” multiple people who had endorsed him and supported him before WITHDREW that or QUESTIONED their decisions PUBLICLY. Yet, he still is in a place of ultimate power.

Here is actually a well written article about this:

What do his tears really mean?

I don’t even want to get started on the fact that the FBI investigation showed that he “didn’t do it”. They were told who and what they can investigate and the fact that that was accepted was absolutely ridiculous and a sign of the times.

“It’s a scary time for young men in America” : 

First, let me just break the heaviness of this topic (kind of) by sharing this

Want to hear a catchy tune? 😉

Okay, now lets talk about this. Yeah, okay I truly get that men may have a legitimate fear of being falsely accused of something, I truly do. However, that being said there are FAR more cases of women coming forward and not being believed, far more cases of men being found guilty but not serving ANY jail time, or far more cases of women who don’t even come forward at all. I don’t think that the below is the extreme we are at.

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Let’s take my boy (NOT) Kavanaugh, I mean what more of a grand scale example do we need? The man was accused of assaulting three (not one, not two, but THREE) women. Guess what, he is confirmed in the supreme court. He is one of the judges who literally gets to decide my future, your future, and America’s future. So please tell me in what way his life is affected? He got his name smeared a little bit? Well, it doesn’t look like it because he has everything he ever wanted. Dr. Ford, on the other hand, is essentially in hiding because she is receiving death threats for coming forward.

Okay, want to take a look at LESS politically related examples? I direct you towards this horrible compilation of news articles, make sure you are logged into Facebook to see it (WARNING THIS CAN BE EXTREMELY UPSETTING):

At the end of the day most men who are falsely accused are vindicated. Most women who come forward are never believed. Want to know why this is so damn dangerous? We then create a culture where women don’t even report, so literally they just live in the same world as their rapist never finding the voice to speak up, and worse the RAPIST ROMES FREE. Look at this powerful post below.

I am not downplaying male victims, and Lord knows there are male victims. However, I will tell you this “its a scary time to be a man” thing IS DOWNPLAYING the terrifying struggles women are going through right now.

Why are we scared as women? 

Some people, a lot of people, think we are overreacting. Nope, wrong. Unfortunately, these extremist views that politicians have ( I.e. “Birth Control is an abortion inducing drug”, overturning Roe V Wade, making fun of rape victims) sets A PRECEDENT. It is so outlandish and never heard of before (yes its heard of but its becoming way more relevant than it should be in politics) but now its being said. So now that it is being said it encourages others that these views and come forward.  It is also shaping young impressionable minds. While we are a country who has a right to free speech, does that right to free speech translate into women not having the right to control their bodies? That should not be the case, yet with these views it is. We shouldn’t have to worry about another person’s freedom of speech reversing rights that we have worked hard for. Is freedom of speech important? Hell yes. Is there some laws out there that need to be changed, such as laws that inhibit the rights of a human beings? HELL yes. Think about it just a few years ago all states made gay marriage legal BECAUSE WE HAD NO RIGHT TO TELL THEM NOT TO GET MARRIED. Just like men and other women have no right to tell a women what to do with their body. So no, we are not overreacting! There is a risk of very conservative, old, and misogynistic men coming forward and taking away what we have earned.

Drawing the line: 

Okay, I get how horrible things like this are and how heated they can make us (hence this blog). However, that being said we NEED to learn where to draw the line. There are some unlikely victims in all this that we fail to remember, the families. WE CANNOT JUDGE a whole family by the actions of one member.

For example, Kavanaugh’s 10 YEAR OLD daughter was a target of a cartoonist’s drawing. Listen here, this girl is a minor and her whole world is being shaken. The whole situation happened 30+ years ago, and if he is guilty, he deserves it to follow him around for the rest of his life. However, it does not need to open up avenues to attack his 10 year old daughter who wasn’t even born at the time, or any members of the family for that matter.

At the end of the day pushing death threats, vile comments, and things along those lines do not make us better or change the situation. In fact I would say when we react like this it lessens the impact of the mission we are trying to achieve here. It gives people an easy out. As messed up as it is, society is looking for any and every reason not to believe you and just to keep on perpetuating rape culture. I mean think about these  common lines:

  • She was wearing barely anything, she asked for it.
  • She is confused about what really happened to her.
  • She was drinking to much.
  • Shes doing it to get back at him for a break up.

ow you are a powerful women and FIGHT as hard as hell, but don’t start fighting with pettiness. Fight with your powerful voice, fight with your mind, fight with your strength to endure. Do not fight like a teenage girl and don’t go after people who aren’t apart of this.

Am I saying we should live in fear?

Absolutely, f****** not! If we live in fear, then we are saying that we are going to to give into these people trying to control our lives. So this section is going to be sort and sweet DO NOT LIVE IN FEAR. Fight for the change and show that women are powerful as shit.

Men I still love you: 

As long as you don’t fit under this category

  • Misogynistic
  • Extremist with views against my rights
  • Telling me what the f*** I can do with my body
  • A rapist, harasser, pig (All which women can be too)
  • Think women have a certain place in the world
  • Want to overturn Roe v Wade
  • Display a clear hatred for women in an interview that determines if you will be on the supreme court or not

I mean do I really need to make this a bigger list you get the picture. BUT SERIOUSLY. I do love you men just like I love women. You have made MANY big contributions to this world, you vote in women’s interest, you support us, you believe in our rights, and you are NOT THE ENEMY. Bad men and women alike are the enemy (notice how I am not saying republican or democrat because I DON’T CARE JUST BE A GOOD PERSON).

This is not a problem that us women have to conquer alone, so if women if you are acting like that STOP IT, this is something that good people and society must fight against TOGETHER. Lets take the politics out of it for ONE SECOND. What is the problem we need to fight against? We need to fight against a culture that shames victims for coming forward, we need to fight against a culture that shames victims from even reporting at all, we need to fight against a culture when men and women alike lose rights they have rightfully earned. Just like we need to fight against stigmas on mental health we need to fight against this!

In conclusion this video explains it perfectly.

 

 

Frustrations with pop culture events and society’s assumption of mental health.

Okay, so this blog comes from a place of disgust, pain, and hurting. Lately a few tragic events  have occurred. Here they are listed

1) Demi Lovato overdosing and, thank God, going to rehab

2) Mac Miller overdosing and dying, which is an absolute tragedy.

3) Everyone blaming Ariana Grande for Mac Miller’s death

The negativity that has stemmed from these two/three  situations has genuinely upset me to the point of tears. So I’m going to go into how these situations are speaking to our society and I’m going to try my BEST to put a positive spin to it but this is a blog that just needs to be put out there if not for anyone else, for me.

I started typing this blog when these incidents were a little more relevant, however I went to England and since it is such a deep topic I had to lay off on typing it while spending time with my granddad but now I am ready to attack this topic.

People are a little torn between finding the connection in mental health issues and addiction and just outright saying addiction is a choice. I won’t go into detail but I will say that as someone who struggles with mental health and has a loved one who is recovered from a horrible addiction MENTAL HEALTH AND ADDICTION ARE CONNECTED. If that offends you, SORRY again we are NOT meant to connect. So lets launch into why I am so passionate about this topic.

Demi Lovato: 

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This one is hard for me. Around a week after she overdosed memes started surfacing making fun of her. I can’t tell you how sad this made me ALONE but then I started reading comments justifying it. Comments like “Since she’s a celebrity and didn’t utilize her resources it’s all her fault”, “Listen to sorry not sorry clearly she didn’t care about her problems”, “Its her fault addiction is a choice”.

So I want to address some of these things. First off, ADDICTION isn’t ALWAYS just addiction. A good percentage of the time there are HUGE underlying mental health issues behind addicts. For example, someone who is depressed may drink their problems away.  The thing about MENTAL HEALTH and ADDICTION is it is not just as simple as identifying a problem and saying “Oh, I have a problem let me seek out help for it”. No, I WISH it was as easy as that. We would be living in a much happier and better society if those who had problems were quick to admit it and seek out help for it.

Lets look at this from an eating disorder standpoint. A LOT of people who have bulimia and or who are just binge eaters without the purging have an underlying addiction, food. Just from experiencing an eating disorder, advocating for those who still have one, and talking with those who have one 9/10 said person will NOT seek out a therapist. They are terrified the therapist will tell them they need to go to treatment, or they will make them eat more/less food, change their ways of lives, etc. Another good chunk of them when go to a therapist because they just believe that they are “fat” and that they don’t have a problem. They have it in their mind that these are normal weight loss habits. My point in this analogy is when you have a sickness or an addiction you are more than likely in denial of that addiction till something happens to you where you admit to yourself you need help.

So, for all of you who are saying that she had all the resources in the world so you don’t feel bad for her, resources or not she needed this rock bottom to seek out help. She is a human being who has her demons like I know every single one of us do. She is going through a hard time, she is seeking help now, and the fact some of you want to make memes out of it just for a laugh is a large part of why people with these issues don’t COME OUT and talk to others about it or even seek help. They are afraid of being JUDGED.

We need to extend our sympathy to those going through this and encourage them to get the proper help they need.

Mac Miller & Ariana Grande: 

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What REALLY angers me about this is that the same world that has no sympathy for Demi Lovato was so angered by Mac Miller’s death that they took that anger out on Ariana Grande. They put Mac Miller on a pedestal of remembrance, which I understand because he was an amazing soul. However,  they then think that she should have stayed with him at his lowest to “fix him”. That is where my issue lies. Yes, Mac Miller died but other than that what is the difference between that and Demi Lovato? They were both suffering

What I am about to say goes for both addiction AND mental health issues. It is NOT anyone else’s job to fix YOU but YOURSELF. While I have sympathy for those with these issues you cannot rely on others to make you better. You and ONLY you can do that. There is nobody who can make you stick with the therapy, there is nobody who can be there EVERY moment you feel like relapsing, there is nobody who can physically stop you from taking the drugs, there is nobody who can read your mind when you are secretly planning to act on your addiction (again look at it from the eating disorder standpoint a person with bulimia doesn’t say they are going to the bathroom to purge). While there actually may be a person in your life that is WILLING to do all those things it will not do anything if you aren’t willing to do those things for yourself.

No girl or man needs to stay in a relationship that is not SERVING them or that is DRAINING them. A purpose of a relationship is to be in love with each other in a mutually beneficial way. Will it be uneven at times? Yes. Will there be hard times? Yes. Will one have to carry the other sometimes? Yes. However, THIS SHOULDN’T BE FOR THE MAJORITY OF THE RELATIONSHIP. You can try to fix someone with these issues till you’re blue in the face or till you even develop your own problems, but as I mentioned before if they aren’t ready to do change it is not going to do s***! Ariana’s decision to leave Mac Miller because his addiction was draining her IS NOT why he died. He died because he was suffering from a DISEASE. You cannot put that blame on anyone else. It is extremely wrong of society to say someone has to stay with someone when they are in the lowest of the lows. I am all for being with someone who supports you through your issues, I have that right now with my boyfriend, but I don’t take him down with me. It is not fair to tell someone who is being dragged down to unhealthily stay and not seek a better life for themselves. You wouldn’t tell anyone in an abusive relationship to stay to help the abuser through their problems and this is absolutely NO different.

Mental health and addiction:

I wanna address ONE more thing. It speaks to the more sympathetic and humane people supporting these celebrities. So many people have sympathy for someone who is famous when they are going through these issues but they NEVER support anyone who isn’t famous. They may run the other way, they may avoid the conversation, they may judge them, see them as worthless, and this double standard HAS TO STOP.

Just because someone is in the public light doesn’t mean that they are more worthy of love and support than any other person who is struggling. I am not saying that you shouldn’t support celebrities with problems obviously that is the whole point of this blog. What I am saying is if you can find a place for sympathy for them you most certainly can find a place of sympathy for everyone.

I strongly stand behind people who say “I don’t know anyone who chooses addiciton”. Yes, some responsibility may lie on them for trying the substance out in the first place but what happens after that is beyond their control. Again, I have seen a loved one go through the rock bottom of addiction. It is dark, it is nasty, it is full of desperation, it is full of lying to those you love, it is full of feeling like there is no point in living, and it is NOT SOMETHING ANYONE CHOOSES.

Support those going through addiction and mental health issues BUT if it is dragging you down and taking you into a dark place know it is okay to walk away. You can root for someone, love them, and support them from a distance. All in all you have to protect yourself first. There is nothing wrong with that.

So that is my take on this whole situation it may be short but if I go much deeper into my thoughts you may be reading a more negative and rant filled blog. I just want us to understand the places that people are coming from with their diseases. Being more sympathetic as a society can truly help others who are struggling. I am so tired of seeing the underbelly of society lately I want to see more strangers rooting for others and I just want to see more love going around.

I hope that you read this and support what I believe in and spread love.

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